Documenting 2020: A Look Back So Far
Remember all those fun images/memes about how awesome 2020 was going to be? Yea, me too! I was all about them hah. Since 2019 had been a tough year I had high hopes that 2020 would be an uneventful one. Quite the opposite, huh? I flew to South Florida late February 2020 and it was during the trip where I had the realization that things were about to get worse before they got better.
In an effort to be somewhat cautious I decided I’d buy some hand sanitizers and disinfectant wipes or spray for the trip. To my dismay I only found 1 of each, travel size, and if I remember correctly I happen to stumble into the hand sanitizer sitting on top of some gum packs while in line. I also remember noticing a significantly empty section in an aisle and when I read the white label it read: MASKS. As soon as I arrived to the airport I noticed several people with those masks, people wiping everything down, and you could hear the conversations taking place all around you and it was about one thing: the rona.
I sat there waiting to board wondering if I should cancel my flight and head back home. I wasn’t too too enthused about the trip anyways. You see, I was going down to finalize and look into some administrative things regarding my dad’s death (told you 2019 was rough). Although happy I’d be seeing a few loved ones by the time the trip came up I was feeling all kinds of apprehension, and this was just not helping.
South Florida seemed a little bit more laid back, but you couldn’t help but hear all about it. Everyone in my hotel talked about, it was all over the news, and I think the state had just discovered their first case. I went about my plans, and left feeling thrilled that I had seen loved ones, accomplished in regards to my dad’s stuff, but exhausted and mentally drained. The flight back was worse: more masks, more hand sanitizers, more wiping down and more talk. Within two weeks of being back the state of PA shut down. Schools were closed and we were under a stay home order.
I again found myself just sitting there. This time though not in an airport but on my couch. This time not trying to decide if I should cancel my trip, but figuring out how I could cancel the last 3 months and whatever was in store. I felt worried, confused, and sad. It stayed like that for awhile. What did I miss? SO much! Although we homeschool I missed going to the library with my kids, going to events with them, attending church, getting together with my friends, running errands, and easily finding toilet paper (seriously what was up with that?)
We all know so much more has managed to happen during this time - things that have caused horrible division. So, ultimately, almost 7 months later I still feel those emotions at times (worry, confusion, and sadness) but I have been able to adjust, adapt, and accept as best I can thanks to my faith. I have no idea what is in store these last few months of 2020 (I’ll make sure to add an end of the year reflection post). But I do know I’ll be here trying to make the best of it, keeping all the people I love in prayer for their health and safety, trusting that it’ll all work out, and hopeful for a sweeter and more loving future.